Tough Days Come, Tough Days Go: A Reflection.
Today was a tough day.
Like many of you reading this, I work a job in order to keep the lights on. I’ve been writing for over two years now, and in my current state, don’t earn enough from my novella series to write full time. So, as part of my ongoing quest to keep food on the table, I’ve been job hunting recently. That’s what got me down today, but let me back things up for a moment.
One thing that I’ve always been open about is my struggle with depression. I talk frankly about depression because I want other people to be encouraged that you can get through it, regardless of where you’re at.
My worst struggles with depression were during my teenage years and my early twenties, when I went through the most difficult phase of my life and was particularly directionless. One constant through all my times of feeling down has been great people who’ve been there for me as I’ve struggled – not judging, just supporting me as I figured things out.
These days, it’s rare for me to have a really bad day of feeling down, but today I was particularly knocked off guard by a job interview where I felt my faith (I’m a Christian, another thing I’m quite open about) was on trial by one member of the panel that was interviewing me.
After feeling quite confronted during the morning interview, I found myself really struggling, and as I settled in to write later on I felt as flat as I’ve ever been, with a lack of hope clawing at my mind, as I questioned why I’d been hauled over the coals for my beliefs (I trained to be a Minister a long time back).
My afternoon sped by into the evening, where all I wanted to do was waste the hours away until bed. But after all that, I’ve found myself here, writing an extraordinarily different reflection for you all. The reason I do this is that i’ve come home, talked it out with my wife, watched a bit of TV, and had a meal. Somewhere in the middle of all that, I started to feel a bit lighter; the spark returned. And as I’m sitting here, I feeling a million times better as a result of keeping going.
So if you’re reading this and you’re feeling down, or if you know someone who’s struggling with depression, I want to encourage you today: you can get through it. Things do get better. I’m not saying that I live in a perfect, zen-like state, but I have found that tough days come, and tough days go – just make sure you’re there for the next sunrise, and never lose hope.
That’s it for today – for those are interested, I’m 50,000 words in on the final novel, and about to go do some more writing.